Is It Wrong to Dream About You?
by DarkPlanet
Summary: Matthew is a rather pathetic person. He has social anxiety and almost no experience with dating. He's pretty much come to terms with the fact that he'll never have a meaningful love life. Gilbert wants nothing more than to change his mind.
1. Hope in my Pathetic Life

Ever since he was 14, Matthew had daydreamed about his first time in bed. He spent many a long night staring up at the ceiling as he planned out the event. He imagined being gently laid on silk sheets by the man of his dreams. Candles would be the only light in the room. They would take off every last bit of clothing, leaving themselves fully exposed and vulnerable. Their hands would explore each other's bodies as if to memorize every curve. Then they would make slow, passionate love for hours. To top it all off, they would cuddle afterwards until they drifted off to sleep.

Of course, that dream couldn't come true. Matthew realised that one night after he skipped a party because he couldn't afford the fifteen dollar entrance fee. He could barely afford instant ramen, let alone silk sheets. He could barely last through a five-minute jerk session, so hours of sex was impossible. And, to put the nail in the coffin, his social anxiety prevented him from meeting any potential soulmates. With that discovery behind him, his dream faded away. Over the course of his college years, he came to accept that he would never find a partner and that he would be a virgin forever. This mindset stuck with him even after graduation. He got a steady job, a few friends, and his own apartment, but he never thought he would lose his virginity.

One afternoon, he decided to meet his friend, Francis, for coffee. The two sat in the back of the cafe, hunched over a table only big enough for two. Francis stirred his coffee absently and asked, "How come I never see you with other men?" Matthew laughed nervously.

"Well, um, I guess most of my friends are girls, so… yeah," he replied. He took a sip of coffee and avoided eye-contact.

"So you just don't date?" Francis said. Matthew nodded. "Oh, honey, that can't be right. When was the last time you dated?"

"I, uh, I had one in highschool. But we broke up after a few months." Francis's eyes widened. He let go of his coffee stirrer.

"Wow. I mean, I knew you were innocent, but this is extreme. We've got to get you a boyfriend." Matthew's face went red. He tried to say something, but his words got caught in his throat. Francis downed his drink in one gulp and stood up. He said, "Come on, we've got work to do." He grabbed Matthew's shoulder and pulled him outside.

"What do you mean?" Matthew asked. Francis was already typing away on his phone. His fingers moved at the speed of light as he went through his contacts.

"Okay, what kind of guy do you like?" he asked. Matthew hesitated. "I don't have all day," Francis warned.

"Um, I like guys who are more muscular, I guess. And, like, I think blondes are cute. Not that other hair isn't good, I just, uh, prefer lighter hair. I mean, anybody would be fine, as long as they're nice…"

"Well, the only muscular blonde I know is taken. But his older brother is single. He's kind of loud, but I think you'd like him." Francis smiled and stared typing a text. "I'll see if he's free. You've got nothing planned for tonight, right?"

"Yeah, but I don't even know what this guy looks like. How am I supposed to-"

"Great! He'll meet us at the bar in half an hour." Matthew froze up.

"But- But I need to shower and change first. And there's no way I can just talk to this guy without knowing anything about him," he protested. Francis waved it off.

"You look fine. Besides, Gilbert can talk about himself for hours. By the end of the night, you'll know him inside and out." Matthew still wasn't convinced, but there was no time to worry. Right now, he just needed to get to the bar and try not to die.

Matthew arrived fifteen minutes late with Francis by his side and butterflies in his stomach. The bar was nearly empty. Matthew glanced around in search of his mystery date, though he had no idea what to look for. Francis nudged his shoulder and pointed at a man with white hair. He was sitting at the counter with two empty beer glasses and another that was half-full. His sleeves were rolled up to show off his sizeable biceps, and he showed no sign of drunkenness. Matthew approached him cautiously.

"Um, are you Gilbert?" he muttered. The man faced him with a wide grin.

"The one and only! You must be that Matthew guy Francis was going on about," he said. He hopped off his chair and gave Matthew a bear hug. "Ah, you're even cuter than I imagined," he added as he pulled away. He sat back down and patted the seat next to him. Matthew sat beside him. He was sweating already, and he felt ready to puke. Maybe this whole thing was a bad idea.

"Uh, nice to meet you," he mumbled. Gilbert finished off his beer and ordered two more. When they arrived, he handed one to Matthew.

"Do ya like beer?" he asked. Matthew nodded and took a sip. He preferred wine, but it wasn't the time for that. Gilbert gulped down a quarter of his glass and sighed happily. He said, "Nothing beats the taste of a good beer. Well, except for good company." He gave Matthew a wink.

"Thanks," said Matthew. He took another sip. Gilbert was coming on strong and fast. If things kept going at that rate, he was bound to crash and burn. Matthew looked for Francis, but he was nowhere to be found. "So, what kind of things do you like?" Matthew asked.

"Well, I always love a good drink. But you probably noticed that already. You probably also noticed that I like hitting the gym. I mean, these bad boys are hard to miss." Gilbert flexed one arm. Matthew couldn't help but stare. He reached out a hand but quickly stopped himself. Gilbert laughed and said, "You can touch my muscles. I know they're too awesome to resist." Matthew bit his lower lip. He put his fingertips against Gilbert's skin. He poked at the hard muscle underneath before wrapping his whole hand around the bicep and squeezing.

"Holy heck," he whispered. Gilbert laughed again and relaxed his arm.

"If you like that, you're really gonna love my abs. I'd show ya right now, but the bartender's real strict with that stuff."

"Oh. Um, maybe later then." Matthew didn't realize what he was saying until it was too late. He looked to see how Gilbert reacted, but he was instantly distracted by Gilbert's eyes. He gasped and covered his mouth. Gilbert raised his eyebrows.

"Something wrong?" he asked. He seemed genuinely concerned.

"Uh, nothing. It's just that your eyes look kinda red in this light."

"That's 'cause they are red. I'm albino. Real rare kinda thing, but I think it just makes me cooler." Gilbert sat up straight. "What do you think?" Matthew chuckled and started to relax. If Gilbert could be chill, then so could Matthew. The pair talked for a long while, sharing stories and laughing together. Matthew stopped drinking after his second glass. The last thing he wanted was a drunken mistake. Gilbert, on the other hand, stopped after five and wasn't even tipsy. He set some cash on the table and took out his phone.

He said, "Hey, can I get your number? I need somebody like you to hang with."

"Oh, o-of course!" Matthew stammered his number.

"Alrighty. Here, I'll send a little test message," Gilbert said. A moment later, Matthew got a text. It read 'Wanna come to my place?' Matthew's face and ears became dark red. He swallowed and bit his lip. Gilbert gave him a grin, though he seemed to be nervous as well. Matthew thought for a moment, took a deep breath, and nodded. "Well, I guess we'd better get going," Gilbert said. There was so much joy in his voice that Matthew almost couldn't handle it.

"Yeah. You lead the way." Gilbert nodded and took Matthew by the hand. The pair left the bar and walked a block down the street, keeping their hands locked all the way to Gilbert's apartment. Matthew's heart hammered in his chest as they walked up the stairs and down the hall of the apartment complex. Could it really be happening? Was this going to be the day that he lost virginity? He watched as Gilbert unlocked and opened the door, revealing a slightly messy living room. Matthew stepped inside and took a look around. There were stray clothes and wrappers strewn about, but the place wasn't a wreck. There was no wall separating the living room from the kitchen, and there was only one window. Gilbert flicked on the lights and flopped down on the couch. He stretched his arms over his head and yawned.

"Make yourself comfortable," he said. Matthew nodded. He walked around the room once before sitting beside Gilbert.

"It's a nice place," he said.

"I know, right? Rent's pretty low, too. It's great." Matthew tried to think up something else, but he was interrupted by a text. He looked down and saw that it was from Francis. 'How did the date go?' it read. Matthew texted back, 'I'm at his place.'

"Who ya texting?" asked Gilbert.

"Oh, it's just Francis asking how things went." Matthew set down his phone. "I guess tonight's not over yet, though, so…" He looked down at his feet. "I guess I'll just have to see what happens." Another text lit up his phone. It read 'I'll leave you two be, then.' A winking emoji was tacked onto the end of the message. Matthew shut his phone off and set it face-down on the coffee table. He tried to act casual about it, but his limbs were shaking. Gilbert watched him with a concerned look in his eyes. He put his hand on Matthew's shoulder. This small bit of contact was enough to make Matthew flinch.

"You alright?" he asked.

"Oh, I'm fine. I'm just a bit on edge tonight, I guess. I've, uh, never gone home with somebody before," Matthew said. He looked down at his lap as he spoke. Gilbert patted his shoulder.

"Well, not much is gonna happen tonight, if that makes you feel any better." He leaned back and put his feet up on the coffee table. "Just gonna sit back, relax, and get to know each other a little better," he added. Matthew nodded and tried to hide his disappointment. Considering his mental state, it was probably best that he didn't have sex. Still, he couldn't stop himself from feeling upset.

"Oh. I kinda thought you wanted something else," he admitted. Gilbert let out a bit of nervous laughter.

"Nah, I'm not into that kind of thing. I mean, you're super cute and all, but I'd like to get to know you first." His cheeks went a bit red as he talked.

"So, uh, does that mean you want to go out again?" Matthew asked.

"If you want to, I'd be more that happy to grab dinner sometime." Matthew gave Gilbert a smile.

"I'd like that."


	2. A Night to Remember

A week after their first meeting, Gilbert invited Matthew to dinner at his apartment. It was a fairly casual meetup, but Gilbert still did his best to impress his date. He made everything from scratch, used his finest table settings and wore a shirt that made his muscles look great. He'd just barely gotten the table set when he heard a knock at the door. He rushed over and flung the door open. Matthew greeted him with a nervous smile. He wore slacks and a dress shirt and had a bundle of flowers in his hand. He held out the flowers and said, "Nice to see you again. I hope you like roses."

"They're lovely. Just like you," said Gilbert as he took the bouquet. "Don't worry, I won't be that cheesey all night." Matthew chuckled and headed for the kitchen. The pair sat down across from each other. Matthew started to serve himself, but Gilbert stopped him. "I'll take care of that. How much do you want?" he said.

"Oh, not much. I kinda snacked a lot today," Matthew replied. Gilbert filled his plate anyways. He then scooped the remaining food onto his own plate. He said a quick prayer before digging in. He shoveled food into his mouth without giving himself time to really taste what he ate. Matthew giggled. He said, "You look just like my brother."

"Oh, really?" Gilbert said between bites.

"Yeah. Well, it's more how you eat then how you look. Alfred always eats really fast. Always takes huge bites and barely chews. I'll go out to eat with him sometimes, and he'll be done before I take my first bite."

"He sounds pretty awesome. Has he ever gone competitive with it?"

"Once. He came in second and got such a bad stomach ache that he never tried again." Matthew poked at his food with his fork. "I love that guy to death, but he makes some pretty poor life choices."

"Are you two close?"

"Well, you know, there is a bit of sibling rivalry, but… I guess we're pretty close."

"Nice. You've probably heard of my brother, Ludwig."

"Francis mentioned him, I think…" The conversation went on like that for two hours. Matthew started to get more relaxed as time passed. He even got a bit flirty, though his face went red every time he said something vaguely sexual.

By the time Gilbert finally got up, Matthew's leftovers had gotten cold.

"You don't have anywhere to be, right?" asked Gilbert. Matthew shook his head and explained that he had a week off work. "In that case, can we just keep hanging out? Maybe we could watch some TV?" said Gilbert. Matthew agreed without hesitation. They cleared the table together and sat down on the sofa. Gilbert turned on the TV and started scrolling through Netflix. "Anything you wanna watch?" he asked.

"To be honest, I usually only watch nature documentaries," said Matthew.

"Sounds good to me. How's about this one?" Gilbert selected a movie about wild birds.

"Looks fun." With that, Gilbert hit select. The opening was a typical series of nature shots with a narrator saying something about the 'majesty of birds.' About ten minutes in, Gilbert's attention wandered. He let his gaze drift to Matthew. Matthew was leaning into the couch with his hands in his lap. His eyes were glued to the screen, and he had the hint of a smile on his lips. Locks of blonde hair hung just above Matthew's shoulders, begging to be touched. Gilbert scooched closer to him. It was then that Gilbert noticed Matthew's eyes. At a glance, they seemed to be a deep blue. But, upon closer inspection, they looked more purpleish than blue. Gilbert couldn't place the exact name of their color, but he was fascinated by the beauty of the hue. He leaned in to get a closer look. Matthew's cheeks went pink.

"If you want a kiss, you can just ask," mumbled Matthew. Gilbert sat up straight again.

"Ah, sorry, I was just looking at your eyes. They're a pretty awesome color."

"Yeah, it's a genetic mutation. Kinda rare."

"That's a pretty great mutation. I could stare at your eyes all day. I mean, damn, I really get lost in them." Matthew's face became a darker shade of pink as Gilbert leaned in again. This time, Matthew turned and faced him.

"I think you can get a better view this way," he said in a near whisper. Gilbert nodded and took another few moments to look. The more he stared, the more he noticed how cute Matthew was. From his adorable face to his twinkish body, he was just Gilbert's type. From what he'd seen so far, Matthew's personality was also top-notch. Gilbert's heart started to flutter. He hadn't wanted to be with somebody so badly in a long time.

"I, uh, think I want to kiss, after all," he said. Matthew's hands started to shake as he reached up to touch Gilbert's face. They both closed their eyes. Gilbert pressed his lips to Matthew's. Immediately, he knew he'd made the right choice. The feeling of Matthew's lips against his own was comforting and somehow familiar. He let himself linger in the moment for just a few seconds before pulling away. He opened his eyes and cracked a smile. Matthew's face was completely red, and he was shaking. "You alright?" asked Gilbert.

"I'm fine. I just- I haven't had a kiss in a while," Matthew said. He put his hands on Gilbert's shoulders and looked up into his eyes. He asked, "Can we do it again?" Gilbert chuckled. He pressed his forehead against Matthew's and gave him another kiss. This time he kept his lips locked on Matthew's for much longer. Matthew held him tightly and leaned against him. When Gilbert finally pulled back, Matthew looked like he was about to melt. "So, does this mean we're, you know, a couple?" Matthew asked. Gilbert tried to hide his excitement. In that moment, he was neck-deep in love.

"Of course! How could I not date you after a night like this?" he said. Matthew hugged him tightly and buried his face in his chest.

"Thank you," he whispered.


	3. Getting Closer

Everything was sort of hazy, but Matthew barely noticed. His every sense was overwhelmed in the best way possible. Sweat rolled down his naked body and soaked the sheets. Gilbert was holding him by the waist as he thrusted. "God, Gil, this feels so good," Matthew said between moans. A particularly hard thrust caused him to arch his back and curl his toes. Gilbert looked down to meet his eyes. He slowed down and gave Matthew a passionate kiss. His hands explored Matthew's sides and chest, stopping to play with his nipples. "I'm close," Matthew gasped, but it was already too late. His heart raced and his mind went blank. All he could think about was the pleasure pulsing through his most sensitive parts. It was all so fast, so fantastic, so-

It was then that Matthew woke up. With a few blinks, the dream was only a memory. His boxers were wet, and a feeling of shame flooded him. It felt like he was a horny highschooler again complete with an obsession over a sporty peer. He groaned and grabbed his phone to check the time. 12:00 pm. Panic took over from there. He jumped out of bed and stripped naked before rushing to find a decent outfit. He got dressed, brushed his teeth and ran out the door in record time. He sprinted down the sidewalk, nearly tripping over himself.

When he arrived at the cafe, he was sweating profusely. Francis already had a table and a half-empty coffee cup. He glanced up from his phone. "Oh, hey. I was just about to text you," he said.

"Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late," Matthew said. He sat down across from his friend.

"It's fine. You're here now, and that's what counts," Francis said. "Now, tell me everything." Matthew gave him a nervous smile.

"Oh, there's really not much to say," he insisted.

"Don't be so shy. You went to Gilbert's place last night, right?"

"Yeah. It was pretty nice. He made this nice homemade meal and everything. You wouldn't get it from looking at him, but he's a really good cook."

"That sounds lovely." Francis glanced around before leaning in closer. "So, did you two do it?" he asked. Matthew blushed from embarrassment, but he wasn't surprised. Despite being older than Matthew, Francis had the mind of a cheerleader in a trashy teen movie. Sex and romance seemed to always be on his mind. He'd brought the topic up enough that Matthew was getting numb to it.

"We kissed, but that's all."

"Did you at least use tongue?" Matthew shook his head. Francis sighed and said, "I kinda figured you'd take things slow. I guess that's the responsible adult thing to do. I just wish it made for better gossip."

"Well, maybe I'll have something better next time. I think I'm gonna ask him out for lunch soon. Or would a casual hangout at my place be better?" said Matthew.

"Either is fine, but the hangout might get you laid faster." Matthew weighed his options carefully. On one hand, he wanted sex really badly. On the other, he didn't want that to be his only goal. He wanted a connection with a side of sex, not the other way around.

"I think I'll go with the lunch date, then. Then maybe we'll hang out after if things go well," he decided.

"Good choice. Now, promise you'll tell me if anything juicy happens, okay?"

"I promise."

As soon as his head touched the pillow, Matthew was reminded of last night's dream. The guilt he felt was immeasurable. He wanted to apologize to Gilbert, but that would just make things weird. But things already were weird. Would he be able to look at Gilbert without feeling shame? What if Gilbert found out? Matthew shifted under the sheets in an attempt to find comfort. No, nothing was wrong. He just had to keep it a secret, and everything would be fine. After all, he couldn't control his dreams, right?

It took a full week for Matthew to push aside his shame and ask Gilbert out to lunch. It took a bit, but they finally found a day where neither of them had work. They decided to meet at a restaurant near Matthew's place. It was going to be a casual event, but Matthew still agonized over what to wear. He ultimately went with a tank top and pair of shorts that left little to the imagination. The outfit made him feel sexy and desirable. He strutted down the sidewalk with a sense of confidence that he rarely felt. However, that feeling started to fade when he saw Gilbert. "Hey, Mattie! You look great," Gilbert said. His silver hair seemed to shine in the sunlight, and his body was as fit as ever. He came over gave Matthew a hug.

"You too," Matthew said. Gilbert broke the hug and took Matthew's hand.

"Let's get inside. It's way too hot to be out here," he said. The pair walked in and sat down at a table for two. Gilbert looked over the menu. He asked "Have you been here before?"

"Yeah. It's so close that it's kinda become by go-to."

"Any recommendations?"

"The salad is my personal favorite, but the burgers are pretty good. Alfred once had three of the double-decker burgers in one sitting, and he didn't get sick of them, so I guess that's a good thing." Matthew chuckled to himself. "That sounds kinda gross now that I say it out loud."

"Maybe I should try to beat his record," said Gilbert.  
"As much as I'd love to see that, I think you should save some room for later. I've got a treat waiting for you at my place."

Gilbert's cheeks went a bit red. He asked, "What kinda treat?" Matthew realized his mistake immediately, but he didn't exactly want to correct himself. In truth, brownies were the only treats he was planning on giving out, but he was more than willing to change that. He tried his best to look seductive.

"That depends on how well this date goes," he said. Gilbert smirked.

"In that case, you'd better get ready for the date of your life."

The waitress came over and took their orders. They ordered a few different things and agreed to share them. They chatted a bit about how life was going while they waited for their food to arrive. Gilbert talked about how boring his office job was, and Matthew could totally relate. The conversation soon devolved into taking turns complaining about work. Luckily, the spiral of negativity ended when their food arrived.

"Everything looks so good," Gilbert said. He cut the burger in half and took a bite. "Yup, I could totally eat at least five of these," he added. Matthew giggled and picked up the other half. He ate slowly so he could savor the flavor. A few crumbs stuck to his mouth after he took the last bite. "You've got a little something," Gilbert said. He took a napkin and leaned over the table. Matthew held still as Gilbert wiped his face lean. The gesture made his heart beat a bit faster.

"Thanks," he said.

"No problem. My family's all neat freaks, and I think it rubbed off on me." Matthew nodded and kept eating. The rest of the meal went smoothly. Gilbert threw a few flirty jokes into their conversation, and Matthew loved every one of them. They stayed for a while after their food was gone and just chatted away. Eventually, the staff started giving them looks, so they had to leave. Gilbert insisted on paying the bill, despite Matthew's protests. Ultimately, they agreed that Matthew would do the tip and Gilbert would handle the rest. They put their money on the table and left hand-in-hand.

"So, uh, do you want to come back to my place? We could watch TV and stuff," Matthew asked.

"How can I pass up an offer like that? Lead the way."


	4. Doing My Best

Matthew's stress had completely melted away. He and Gilbert were relaxing on the couch and chatting away like old friends. The conversation was innocent enough, aside from a few flirty comments. Matthew barely stuttered or blushed throughout the conversation, and he even got comfortable enough to flirt a bit. A plate of brownies sat on the coffee table, but the pair was too focused on each other to eat them. After an hour of talking, they started to talk about their love lives. Matthew admitted that he knew nothing about dating. Gilbert replied, "You're kidding, right? How could a guy like you not be drowning in dudes?"

Matthew giggled and replied, "Seriously, I've barely dated."

"Well, you seem like a pro to me."

"I must be a good actor, then. The last time I dated was in high school."

"I never would have guessed it. I mean, it's not every day that a newbie scores a guy like me." He flexed one arm. Matthew laughed again. "Okay, but seriously, why haven't you been into dating?" Gilbert said.

"That's just because I haven't really tried. Plus, I normally get all anxious around strangers. Makes it pretty hard to get to know somebody, you know? To be honest, I was really nervous the first time I met you. But then that calming vibe of yours sunk in, and I just kinda…" Matthew trailed off.. He feared that he'd say something regrettable if he kept going. The apartment grew quiet, but the silence was not uncomfortable. Gilbert looked into Matthew's eyes. His expression was somewhere between flirty and nervous.

"I'm glad you decided to spend more time with me," he said. He put his hand on Matthew's knee. He seemed to hesitate for a moment before he added, "I know we've only known each other for a little while, but I think I'm falling in love with you."

This was when Matthew would normally have gotten flustered. He should have been blushing and stumbling over his words, but he totally calm. He said, "I feel the same way," and put his palm against Gilbert's cheek. The look on Gilbert's face was priceless. He looked like he was about to cry from joy. "Can I kiss you?" Matthew asked.

"Of course." Matthew closed his eyes and pressed his lips against Gilbert's. His body relaxed as he let his partner take the lead. Gilbert krept one hand up Matthew's thigh, stopping an inch before the leg of his shorts. He rested his other hand on Matthew's shoulder. He broke the kiss for just a moment to ask, "Can I go a little further?" This was when Matthew finally started to get embarrassed. His cheeks felt hot. He nodded and shut his eyes tighter. Gilbert kissed him once more, this time with his lips parted. His tongue met Matthew's for the first time, causing both of their faces to turn red. Matthew tensed up at first, but he soon started to enjoy himself. Kissing Gilbert felt so surreal. It was everything he could have ever hoped for.

It almost felt like a dream.

Shame hit Matthew like a truck. Faint memories of that dirty, disgraceful dream came back. All of the joy drained from his body. He broke away from Gilbert. He wanted to apologize so badly. He looked down at his legs and muttered, "Sorry." Gilbert took his hand off Matthew's thigh. He looked a bit hurt, but he was trying hard to hide it.

"You alright, Mattie?" he asked.

"I- I just remembered something. I'll be right back, okay?" Matthew said. He stood up and rushed to his bedroom. He shut the door behind him and leaned against it. Oh, god, why was this happening? Everything was going so well, and he just had to fuck it all up. He groaned and hid his face in his palms. How was he going to come back from this disaster? Gilbert probably wanted to go home. Matthew shook his head. Negativity wasn't going to help. What he needed was to calm down, go back to Gilbert, and figure it out from there.

"In ten seconds, I'll be calm," he whispered to himself. He took in a deep breath.

1, 2, 3… Everything was fine.

4, 5, 6… He could still save this date.

7, 8, 9… The dream was nothing to worry about.

10.

He let out his breath and tried to push out all his worries with it. It was all going to be alright. He didn't have to be physical to have a nice date. He could just avoid anything sexual until the dream faded from his memory. Yeah, that would probably work. He faced the door. His nerves still bothered him a bit, but he managed to repress them enough to function. He walked back into the living room. "Sorry about that," he said. Gilbert was still on the couch. He smiled at the sight of Matthew, but his true feelings were clear. Matthew sat down next to him. He sighed. "Look, I really do like you. You're everything I want in a guy and more. I want to be with you, honestly, but..." He trailed off as his nerves returned.

Gilbert's face fell. "But what?" he asked.

"I- I can't sleep with you. There's a lot going on, and it's all happening so fast. I'm just not ready to go that far. I'm sorry." Gilbert stared at him silently. Matthew's heart pounded. He was so afraid of what Gilbert thought that he didn't dare look at his face. He bit his lip. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that Gilbert was shaking his head.

"Geeze, Mattie, you really do apologize too much. I don't mind taking things slow. It's your choice, after all," he said.

"Ah, sorry."

"There you go again!" Gilbert chuckled and gave Matthew a pat on the shoulder. "You're too cute, man." Matthew's face lit up. He leaned against Gilbert's shoulder.

"You too," he said.


	5. One Step Back, Two Steps Forward

Matthew was in the middle of rewatching Naruto when the call came. He reluctantly paused the show and grabbed his phone. The number on his screen was foreign to him. He declined the call and unpaused the TV. No telemarketer was going to interrupt his personal time. The phone rang again a minute later. Same number. Matthew hovered his finger over the decline button. But what if it was actually important? Maybe one of his friends had gotten a new number. He hit accept and put the phone to his ear. "Hello?" he said.

"It's Ludwig, Gilbert's brother. Is this Matthew?" said the person on the other end. They had clearly been crying. Matthew got a sinking feeling in his gut.

"Yeah, I'm Matthew. Is something wrong?"

"There's been an accident. I- I don't know the details, but-" Ludwig took a deep breath before continueing. "Gilbert's been asking for you. Everything's probably going to be fine, but I think he'll need some company, at least." Matthew tried his hardest not to panic. If everything was really going to be fine, then why did Ludwig seem so upset? What kind of accident even happened? There was no time to dwell on those questions. Right now, Gilbert needed him.

"Where is he?"

"The ER. I think it's room 135 to be exact."

"I'll be over in ten." Matthew hung up and pulled on his shoes without any socks. He booked it out to the street and waved down a taxi. When the driver asked where he was going, Matthew handed her a twenty and said, "Get me to the ER as fast as you can." Within a few minutes, he had arrived. He bolted inside and asked the receptionist where Gilbert was. His pajama bottoms were sagging and his t-shirt was sweaty, but he barely noticed. The receptionist raised an eyebrow at him.

"Last name?"

"Belshimitt. He's in room 135, I think."

"And you are…?"

"Matthew. I'm his partner." After checking a few papers, the lady told him to head down the hall and to the left. He gave her a quick smile of thanks before speed-walking to the room. The door was ajar, and he could see Ludwig standing by the bed. "Is everything okay?" Matthew asked. He tried to sound casual.

"Mattie! See, I told you he'd come," Gilbert said as he waved his bandaged hand. He struggled to sit up. "C'mere, man." He patted the tiny bit of space that was still left on the bed. Matthew came up and put his hand on Gilbert's shoulder. Gilbert winced but didn't stop him.

"What happened?" Matthew asked.

"Ah, not much. Some jackass in a gas-guzzler ran into me. No big deal," Gilbert said. "The worst part was that I didn't get his license number."

"Are you sure you're alright? You seem pretty beat up."

"Nah, dude. He was only going like 56 kilometers an hour. Barely scratched me." Matthew glanced at Ludwig.

"I didn't know head trauma was a scratch," Ludwig said.

"Oh, lighten up, bruder. You're scaring Mattie. It's just a little headache." Ludwig sighed and looked away. His eyes were still a bit puffy from crying. Gilbert continued, "Anyways, I'll probably be out in a bit. Just gotta… uh..." He stared blankly into space for a moment.

"You're not going anywhere until you've been treated. Now, I wish I could stay and make sure you don't sneak off, but I have a flight to catch. Matthew, I trust that you'll keep him in line," Ludwig said.

"Uh, what?" Matthew said. Everything was happening so fast; he didn't know what to think.

"I'm sorry to put all this on you, but I'll lose my job if I don't leave right now. Just keep him safe for me." Ludwig patted Matthew's shoulder and waved goodbye to his brother. "Hopefully we can meet again in better conditions," he said. And then he was gone, leaving Matthew alone with Gilbert. Gilbert chuckled and sunk into the understuffed hospital pillows.

"That guy worries too much. I'll be just fine," he said.

"Right," Matthew said without a trace of a smile. "Can I get you anything?"

"Coffee would be great. Not this hospital shit, though. I need a real, strong brew. Oh, or maybe a beer. Think you could sneak me one of those?"

"I don't think that's allowed."

"Aww, don't be such a prude." Gilbert folded his arms. "You're acting just like Ludwig." Matthew chuckled but stood his ground. Looking back, he wished he'd gotten Gilbert that beer.

Thirty minutes later, a diagnosis was given. Unsurprisingly, Gilbert had head trauma. It wasn't a severe case, but it wasn't anything to laugh at. Rest was mandatory, and he wasn't supposed to drive for a while. He also had some bad bruising, but nothing was broken. He was free to go home, but he was encouraged to have somebody to help him out around the house. Gilbert laughed at the news. He sat up and declared, "Rest? Nah, man. My body can handle anything. A little head trauma won't hold me back." He stood up, took a wobbly three steps forward, and fell over. Matthew managed to catch him just in time and made him sit back down.

"I'll call you an uber," he offered. Gilbert groaned.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I can call my own uber." He took his phone out of his pocket and found that it was completely broken. He cursed. "I'll take the uber," he said.

"Alright. I think I'll go with you, too. Just to make sure you get settled in okay."

"What's the point? I'll be on my own, anyways. Might as well just let me go now." Matthew hesitated for a moment.

"You're right. I'll just have to take you home and care for you myself. Do you need anything from your place?"

Gilbert said, "You really are too good to me. I'll just wanna grab my snacks and laptop and I'll be set." He stood up again. This time he was able to take a whole five steps before he had to lean against Matthew. He looked at the nurse with the biggest grin on his face and said, "This one's a keeper, right?" Matthew chuckled. He patted Gilbert's shoulder.

"I sure hope so. Now let's get you home," he said.

Matthew helped him check out, called an uber and took him outside to wait. Gilbert managed to get the hang of walking and was able to get into the car with minimal nausea. They went to Gilbert's place and loaded up on snacks and entertainment before heading over to Matthew's apartment. Gilbert made a beeline for the couch and laid down. All that walking was too much for his sore legs. Matthew carried the bulk of Gilbert's things and set them on the kitchen counter. He gathered his spare pillows and blankets. "I'm sorry that I don't have a guest bed. I can sleep on the couch, if you want," he offered.

"I'm not gonna kick you out of your own bed, man. I could totally take the couch," Gilbert said.

"I don't want you to be uncomfortable. You need a proper place to rest."

Gilbert shook his head. "Nah, there's gotta be a better way. What size bed do ya got?"

"It's a queen."

"That settles it, then. We'll share it," said Gilbert. Matthew's face got a bit pink.

"Isn't that a bit, uh, you know-"

"It'll be fine. I'm too sore to try anything, trust me." Gilbert stood up and walked over to Matthew. He took the spare pillow and asked, "Where's the bedroom?" Matthew lead him into his bedroom and immediately felt embarrassed. Dishes and clothes were everywhere, and the sheets were coming off the bed. Gilbert glanced around. His eyes settled on a box of issues that sat on the bedside table next to a container of lotion. He hurried to look away, but Matthew had already noticed.

"Sorry about the mess."

"It's fine. Reminds me of home." Gilbert got on the bed and leaned against the headboard. He put the pillow behind his back for support. Matthew set a spare blanket on the edge of the bed and started cleaning up. He gathered his dirty clothes and put them in the laundry basket. "You don't have to do all that," Gilbert said.

"It's no big deal, really. I should start cleaning more regularly, anyways," Matthew insisted. He piled up his dirty dishes and carried them into the kitchen. He came back with a duster. After wiping off every surface in the room and putting away some of his more embarrassing possessions, he decided to lay down beside Gilbert. He sighed as his head hit the pillow. "Alright, I'm done. Oh, dang, I almost forgot!" He sat up and faced Gilbert. "Do you need anything?"

Gilbert chuckled. "If you could get my diary, that would be great. Oh, and maybe a water."

"Sure thing!" Matthew got up and headed for Gilbert's pile of belongings. He grabbed a water bottle and a small red book that he presumed was the diary and brought them back to the bedroom. Gilbert gladly took them. He opened the diary, flipped to a blank page and started writing.

"Dear diary," he said aloud. "Today some dumbass decided to hit me while I was on my way to get more beer. Luckily, my excellent body held up against the attack. I even get to hang out at Mattie's place, now. It's a pretty sweet deal." He slammed the book shut.

"I didn't know you kept a diary," Matthew said while he held back a giggle.

"I have to make sure my life story is preserved for future generations."

"Right. Maybe I should keep a journal, too."

"That would be nice. I have a few blank ones at home. Remind me to give you one."

"Sounds like a plan."


End file.
